“The only difference between a 'slut' and a lady is the amount of information they choose to give out about their sex life.” -Me
There is a phase in almost every modern day woman's life that they experience. No, I am not referring to menopause. The phase I am referencing is what I like the call the “Why Not Phase (WNP).”
Definition of the Why Not Phase : (hwi-not-faz) n.
a period of time in a woman's life when they are seeing several men, whether it be for dates, booty calls, or other forms of companionship.---Synonyms. Single Phase, Experimental Phase, Slutty Phase.
---Sentence. “I am in my Why Not Phase as I have a date with Jason during the day and then Tom is sleeping over at night. I hope that guy I brought home from the bar last weekend doesn't remember where I live and shows up.”
My thoughts on the WNP are simple: as long as you are unashamed of what you do, all the power to you. If you wake up half-naked next to a stranger and you can't tell your friends about it or you feel the need to rush home and scrub his scent and your shame off your body while you lightly sob in the shower, then its probably not the right time in your life to enter the WNP. I'm annoyed by people who feel the need to judge or make a fuss about the lifestyles of women in their WNP. Why don't you stick to worrying about your life and I'll live mine. Samantha Jones (Sex and the City) said it best: “that is my life and I don't have to justify it.”
Why do women enter the WNP? Well, there are many different reasons. Not all are good ones. I was always a one-man sort of lady with no game. Until I realized that these men were all dead end cheaters and I am not the kind of woman that allows myself to be treated that way. I decided that it was time to do a little exploring. I went on several dates and I'm not going to lie, I had a few adult sleepovers. How did I feel? Great. For the first time in my life I wasn't seriously crushing on a certain boy, wondering how he felt in return. Instead, I was meeting new people and experiencing new things. If a boy asked me on a date, I'd say yes without consideration. I figured I had nothing to lose, either it was going to be a lot of fun or it would make for a hilarious story. I have an infinite amount of respect for myself and felt completely comfortable. I didn't lead these guys on like an jerk. I made it clear to each and every one I was not looking for anything serious whatsoever, so no damage done in that sense. I wasn't doing it for attention, I wasn't doing it to impress anybody, I was doing it because I had no answer when I asked myself, “why not?” For couples who have only been with each other and are happy about it, congratulations that is truly amazing. It is not for everyone though, including me. When it comes to men I love being spontaneous and I love the hardships, the juicy secrets, the awkward situations, the mentally and physically passionate moments, the getting to know someone, the heartbreaks, the good and bad first dates, the first kisses, the how am i getting home? moments, the wtf is he doing? situations. I love sharing my stories and experiences with friends and reflecting back on them myself with a good chuckle. Most of my stories start off like this: “omigosh, it was so embarrassing...” and I wouldn't have it any other way.
To expand on the quote I opened with, there are women who go through their entire WNP undetected and there are women who feel the need to announce their one night stand roster to the world. Both are fine, that's your prerogative but be prepared for the consequences. Sometimes its empowering to have secrets with yourself. Personally, I am not one to regret most of the things I do (with the exception of sort-of recent encounter that ended my WNP) and usually when I have an encounter with a man, sexual or not, hilarity is involved. My favourite thing to do is make people laugh so I am completely unashamed to tell my friends my WNP stories.
Speaking of stories, I'd like to share one with you that occurred during my WNP.
I knew him through friends and have never thought of him in a sexual or romantic way until I was drunk and he romanced me by sharing his beer. I was at a local bar with a few friends when I saw “Raymond” sitting on the patio. We haven’t seen each other in several years so I sat down with him and we made small talk. He is BY FAR the most genuinely nice and most down-to-earth person I have ever met. I'm not sure if it was the alcohol, the recent break-up, or the fact that he is extremely good looking but I remember wanting him. Normally I am shy and subtle but I came right out and asked if he had a girlfriend; negative. Perfect. Game on. Okay. A few drinks and a couple flirtatious leg touches while laughing at something that wasn't very funny later, we were on the dance floor making out (I was one of those people I laugh at). A couple weeks later we are hanging out in his basement and we succumb to temptation and the several alcoholic drinks we devoured. So here we are in his bed, sans clothes. Now, I was born with masculine instincts and therefore I wanted to peace out and crawl into the inviting comfort of my own bed but a few things were stopping me; I was too drunk to drive, it appeared he was interested in cuddling, I didn't know where my underwear were. Okay, it looks like I'm staying. I have trouble falling asleep in other people's beds, especially if it is my first time sleeping over. We were in classic spoon position (him being big spoon, me being little spoon) and therefore my butt was nestled into his crotch area. I was just about to drift to sleep when I accidentally let out a fart. As soon as it slipped out my heart stopped and my eyes sprung open and widened as much as possible. Oh, my. GOD! Really!? Did I JUST do that? I just farted on his junk. COOL, not! I laid completely still. Maybe he didn't feel/hear it? He sort of twitched his leg as if he did though. This is something that is still considered unacceptable after a year or two of dating. He ended up calling me back and we've hung out a couple more times after that but still to this day I am not sure if he realized the horrible crime I committed on his package. Woops.
Thank you so much for reading!
Love Chelsea!!
This picture has nothing to do with my blog topic. I just thought it was funny. Look at all those goat butts!
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